In August of '08 my husband was laid off from his job. It was a blow to both of us as we both thought that was pretty secure there. Here in the small town we live in there is not many job opportunities for him to get a job. He has been doing odd jobs here and there but mostly he is trying to build up the business that we have through a company through Market America.
Because of this he has been home a lot more. I absolutely love that he is home. Some things that I don't love, however, are for the the first several months he would sit on the bed with the laptop on his lap while looking for a local job and developing his social circle, supposedly so he can do the business, which is mostly true. I called it his "whole". I know that it was important for him to look for work whether it was a job or for MA but did he have to be their all day. Because he was "working" he expected me to do his leg work all the while doing what I normally do, raising and homeschooling our 4 kids and the housework.
I got annoyed that he didn't help out more around the house. Was that wrong of me? He was after all "working". The truth is he didn't spend that whole time "working". He was doing what we all do at the computer too. Socializing for fun. I talked to him about it and he understood my point and said he would help out more
Well now it has been over a year and he is still home. The good news is that he does help out more. He washes dishes, he cooks sometimes and he does the Mr. Mom things when I can find the odd job to help with finances. Things were going go for awhile. Now though it seems that when he does help it seems to be with the attitude of "I guess I better get this done because you sure aren't going to do it". He hounds me everyday about what I have planned for lunch and supper even though it is written on a menu in the kitchen. For lunch he starts on me about 10:30 asking what I have planned, not so that he could help fix it, but like I forgot that the kids need to eat lunch. I don't know if I am imagining this attitude or not. I can't really point out any actual evidence to prove it. I don't know. I guess it is time for another talk.
Just for the record I really do love my hubby. He is a great father and my best friend and it is good to know that I can go to him with problems even if that problem is his behavior and I hope he feels he could do the same with me.